Thursday, January 14, 2010

WTF is that on the Surface? : Theme Thursday

This week's Theme Thursday topic is "Surface".   There's a great group of writers participating each week so be sure to go check them out. You'll be glad you did!  In the meantime, here's my offering.


At first I couldn't think of a damn thing to write about this theme, but then I remembered a piece I wrote about six months ago.  If it's not considered too tacky, I'm going to re-post this little ditty about a few items that are now decorating...

The Surface of the Moon!

Thursday, June 18, 2009

And I Thought I Was a Slob...

Today on Twitter, Rachel Maddow posted a link to a site that lists all the crap that's been left on the surface of the moon by NASA. And I thought I was a slob!

Check it out:

I mean, really! I can see them leaving an American flag on the moon... just to prove to detractors and conspiracy theorists that man really did land on the moon. I may be a slob, but even I know you're not supposed to leave your junk around when you visit somebody else's house.

Anyway, here are some of the things that got left behind...

  • Number 18 on the list is "scongs". WTF is a scong? (If anyone can tell me, I'll personally give you credit in my next blog posting.)***
  • Number 33: Defecation collection device. Talk about a worthless piece of shit!
  • Number 50: Urine collection assembly, small (2)
  • Number 51: Urine collection assembly, large (2) Okaaay! So which one would you request, large or small? Is it better to get two small collection bags or one big one? How are they allocated... by how you frame your request? Which of these people do you think would get the large collection assembly:
"Excuse me, but I believe I have to urinate.
Would you be so kind as to direct me to the water closet?"
vs.
"Holy Shit! Do I ever have to take a piss! Where's the head?"
  • Number 60: Central Station As in Grand Central Station? No wonder people are wandering around NYC looking lost all the time.
  • Number 64: Gnomon (includes mount) Is this like a little statue of a gnome riding a horse?
  • Number 78: Footprint Just one? Sure looks like a lot more in the photo below... but maybe that's just part of the whole conspiracy! Besides, can a footprint even be considered something you "left"? I'm thinking a list of things that were left should include actual objects.
  • Number 81: Plastic covering for Flag (1) So, does it rain on the moon? Did they leave the covering on the flag, or is it just lying there, waiting for someone to come back and use it to protect the stars & stripes forever?



What I really want to know is...

What would Neil Armstrong's mother
say about all this? 
She obviously didn't bring him up very well!


(BTW... I distinctly remember staying up really late, into the wee hours of the morning, to watch the moon landing on television. The astronauts were late... very late. Just like everyone usually is to an appointment watched by millions.)
***Additional note:  The great Madame DeFarge solved the mystery of the scong... with a little help from M. DeFarge.  To find out what it is, you'll have to backtrack to this post by clicking on the link above.

23 comments:

Anonymous said...

OK, for all the people, like myself, who don't think they landed on the moon could you change it to "What they left in Area 51". I would feel much better about it (kidding!).

Anonymous said...

Mrs Armstrong was overheard telling neil to go clean his room, she should have said "moon"

Secretia

Brian Miller said...

lol. the comments are hillarious...his mom probably just rolled her eyes and knew he was hers. lol.

nonamedufus said...

But you didn't answer the big question: Is the moon really made of cheese?

Gone, long gone. said...

Here's a new game: Go find the trash!
http://www.google.com/moon/

ReformingGeek said...

Let's all go to Neil's house and use the toilet without flushing. Or maybe we pee in his fountain or something.

Anonymous said...

For real? They trashed the moon?

Now the moon is ghetto?

Dang!

Janice said...

Lunar litterbugs...a turn off, but your comments were very funny.

Lee said...

Last night I read a Dr. Seuss book to my son about the moon. I asked my daughter if she knew the first person to land on the moon and she said Lance Armstrong.

Me-Me King said...

Now, that's funny. I miss this the first time around, thanks for reposting.

Jayne Martin said...

Definitely worth the re-post. We humans are a messy lot.

Tom said...

in a million years, aliens will have a better chance of learning about us from the moon than from the earth...which we'll probably blow up.

gayle said...

Thanks for the re-post!! Loved it!! I wasn't around the first time!!!

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

frigginloon: moon, Area 51... both are synonymous with space exploration.

Secretia: Actually, the moon is looking much neater than my house at the moment... gotta go clean up those scongs.

Brian: Much like my mother still rolls her eyes when my name is invoked.

dufus: The failure to answer that question alone indicates that the moon landing was a scam.
Maelstrom: google moon! Fun times!

Reffie: That will show him!

Quirky: No more ghetto than my house, I'm afraid. Although I do pick up my urine collection assemblies on a regular basis.

Janice: Lunar litterbugs, indeed!

Wings: :) to you, too!

Lee: Lance Armstrong... bikes faster, jumps higher... a lot higher!

Me-Me: Reposting... the blogger's fallback option when the muse has gone missing.

Jayne: I know... rather pathetic, isn't it! I guess they never heard the phrase, "Take nothing but pictures, leave nothing but footprints."

Tom: Dumpster diving anthropologists will have a heyday.

Gayle: Glad you enjoyed it!

Mike said...

Fuckin' astronauts! Can't send them anywhere! Now that the space program is mixed with men and women, there are probably used condoms orbiting the planet! Talk about a manned mission to Uranus! haha!

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Otin: Floating Condoms? EEEWWWW! Manned mission to Uranus... (I feel like I must be back in Jr. High school because that made me LOL.)

Dreamhaven said...

One piece here
Another one there.
Do they really
Think it's fair
To clutter a surface
So pristine?
Truly makes me
Want to scream.

Someone should give them a ticket for littering.

Baino said...

Haha . . I'm late but I loved this. Add all that to the other junk just orbiting around waiting to drop on our roofs and it really makes you wonder! Space junk anyone?

Little Ms Blogger said...

Wouldn't it just be easier to put a garbage can up there?

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Dreamhaven: Ah... a comment in verse! I shall give you the honor of issuing Mr. Armstrong his ticket.

Baino: Leave it to earthlings to find even more places to leave all our crap.

Little Ms Blogger: I think that's what all the craters are for... garbage disposal receptacles. (Apparently NASA thought that was what they were for, too.)

Phillipia said...

To the Moon...takes on a whole new meaning:)

Megan said...

Ha! Thanks for the re-post, I too was not around here at that time, so it was new to me.

Great job with the surface theme!

MikeWJ at Too Many Mornings said...

I scongs are scones that have spoiled. They must leave them behind to save fuel or something.

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