The Real King Kamehameha

I must ask your forgiveness for the blatantly sexist picture I used to illustrate Kamehameha Day.  If only I'd thought to include a manly specimen to go along with the girly-girl.  

As it turns out, I have much more in common with the real King Kamehameha himself.  What, you may ask?  I simply refer you to this painting of his corpulent visage*:

Enough said!

*illustration blatantly stolen from Wikipedia